For this month’s Tuneup I want you to think about the three most important relationships in your life.  These relationships are those with yourself, with others, and with a higher power.

Before you can give of yourself to others it is necessary to nurture your own soul and needs. 
I like to equate the importance of one’s relationship with themselves to the bodily organ of the heart.  The heart is responsible for nourishing all the different bodily organs by pumping blood to them.  However, where does the heart pump blood to first?  What does it see as the body’s most important organ?  Itself!  Before it can nourish other organs in the body, the heart must nourish itself.  So too, you must nourish and build your relationship with yourself before you can build your relationship with others.

How do you nourish your relationship with yourself?  The same way you nourish relationships with anyone else – by spending time with them.  Spend some time alone indulging in your favorite activities and nourishing your passions.  Learn what makes you tick and get your heart pumping and pursue it.  Live the life you were meant to live!

Following this model you can nourish and develop your relationship with others.  Spend time with those that are important to you or those with whom you would like to build a relationship.  Learn what interests them and what makes them tick, and spend time working together on it.  The easiest way to build a relationship with someone is through the sharing of a common bond.  Seek out a mutually enjoyable activity and schedule it into your hectic life to ensure that you continue building this relationship on a daily/weekly/monthly basis.

No matter what your religious beliefs, acknowledging the beauty and positive elements in your life will help you continue to grow. Taking time our of your day to acknowledge your blessings and gifts, whether you attribute it to a specific higher power or not, will help inspire and motivate you to continue using these talents and gifts to build your relationship with yourself and others.

So make this month one in which you continue to nourish yourself and your own needs as well as connecting with others and constantly appreciating the amazing blessing tha is your life,
I know I will!

Stay True,
Loren

Spirit Tuneup
Angelica Mercado, Newark, NJ Facilitator

Attitude of Gratitude

How often do we get caught up in the day to day happenings of our lives that we forget to take
a moment to reflect on all of the wonderful things in our lives and the blessings that have been bestowed upon us? If our desire is to live a life of abundance, it is important to show gratitude for all the things we currently possess. We must learn to give thanks for all the little miracles that happen throughout our day. I personally like to do this by writing in a gratitude journall either first thing in the morning, or in the evening before going to bed, and sometimes on the train during a commute. Giving thanks gives me a sense of peace and fulfillment.  It reminds that absolutely everything I need to live a joyous life is present right now. Everything else that comes along the way is an extension of that life.
So decide today to begin living your life with an attitude of gratitude. Don’t wait until tomorrow
or until you get home. As soon as you are done reading this, thank someone for the contributions they have made to you and your life, big or small, as they have all contributed
to the amazing person you are today. Be thankful for all you have in your life, good, bad and everything in between. Recognize that it is those moments of difficulty that allow you to step
into your greatness and embrace them.
If possible, keep a gratitude journal and take 5 minutes to write down everything you are grateful for that day. It can be a person, a situation, an experience, or merely being grateful
for life itself. If you can’t keep a journal, you can do this out loud, while doing day to day tasks, getting ready for work, on your commute, etc... This also works great with the family, during breakfast or dinner. Ask everyone what they are personally grateful for that day. Incorporate Gratitude into your everyday life. I’m sure you will be pleasantly surprised at the responses you will hear. Do this for the next thirty days and begin to take notice of all the blessings you currently possess and all the ones that come your way.
Please then be sure to share your experiences with us. We would love to hear of all
the positive and incredible things happening in your life.

Communication Tuneup
Mary "Eeeenergy" Garcia, Los Angeles, CA Facilitator

A wise man once said  "The quality of your life is the quality of your communication (with yourself and with others)."  Take a moment and think of some of your most profound happy memories with your significant other, with a friend, a child even a stranger.  That impression
on your soul was made through communication.  So often we think it was the words spoken, but communication is so much more than words, sometimes it is just the act of being fully present in that moment.

Lets start by re-discovering the art of being fully present.  I'm choosing this as a starting place, because as a business owner, wife and mother of 4 children, I know that the world has so many distractions.  We, the movers and shakers, want to do so much for so many. This is
a noble task, but often we do a little of this and a little of that and in the end are frustrated with the lack of depth in our relationships.  We have so many demands on our time with technology such as cell phones, landlines, multiple emails and oh yes let's not forget that Facebook account! :-)

As women we have the phenomenal gift of being able to multi-task like no one's business.
  I pride myself on being able to prepare a gourmet 7 course meal, closing a huge real estate deal while intermittently texting with my right hand (that's huge because I'm left handed). 
This might work when no one is watching, but there are times when someone wants to communicate.  They long to connect with us and we are unable to allow the process
if we aren't free of distractions and are not fully present.

When I realized the disappointment I was causing I made it a point to schedule time for calls and texting and times to really be fully present with whomever was in front of me.  I believe
we are teachers in each others lives and when we are caught in that land of electronics it is
so easy to miss the gifts my teacher has for me.

I invite you to listen with enthusiasm turn off the distractions and find the beauty that loved ones and strangers alike have for you!

Relationship Tuneup
Susan Baker, Highlands Ranch, CO Facilitator

His Needs/ Her Needs 

Every human being in the world has 6 human needs.  A successful relationship is one where each person understands what needs the other person values the most and what has to happen to meet those needs. When you are meeting your partner’s needs at a high level it is like a magic button.   Relationships where both people are meeting the needs of the other person at a level 7 or above (on a 1-10 scale), rarely have challenges.  As you read about
the 6 human needs start to think what needs you value the most and what needs your significant other values the most.  (This works with friends and your kiddos too!) 
The 6 Human needs are:  

1. Need for certainty- certain that you can be comfortable- to have pleasure and avoid pain - sometimes called the need for control. 
2. Need for significance- the need to feel special, important, needed, and wanted. 
3. Need for uncertainty/variety- the need to “mix things up” and keep things exciting. 
4. Need for love and/or connection- everyone needs connection with other humans and everyone strives for and hopes for love. 
5. Need for growth- when we stop growing, we die.  We need to grow emotionally, intellectually and spiritually.  
6. Need for contribution- to go beyond your own needs and give to others.   

We need to meet these needs every day, in one way or the other.   Determine the order of importance for your human needs as well as the order of importance of your significant other’s human needs.  Then give yourself a score of 1-10 on how successfully you are meeting each of your partners needs.  Since relationships survive and thrive when we focus on the other person, start with how well you are meeting their needs and THEN score your partner on how well you feel like they are meeting your needs.  Have your significant other do the same thing and then trade answers. 
If there are areas where you could do better think of 3 things that you can do to better meet your partners needs in those areas.  Keeping in mind last month’s Tuneup on the 5 love languages may help you to know how to meet their needs more effectively.  For example, if your partner likes words of affirmation but they aren’t feeling like you are meeting their need to feel significant very well- you could write them a love note or remember to give them a heartfelt complement each day.   
Make this a fun game with your significant other and both of you will benefit from the results!   

Self-Care Tuneup
Jane Ashley, Guilford, CT Facilitator

As women, we often become taken over by the care-giving that we do—for our children, our husbands or partners, our parents, our jobs—and we lose sight of taking care of ourselves. This may lead to burn-out, depression, anxiety or distancing ourselves from experiencing
the full breadth of our lives. Let’s take this month to focus on ourselves, so that we can fill ourselves back up in order to have enough to give.

What does it mean to “fill myself up?” Well, for me, it can mean taking 30 minutes to work out, or take a walk, or read, or take a bath. It often means taking a few minutes to be alone with myself, and observe the never-ending thoughts racing through my head. When I quiet my mind for a few minutes, by sitting alone, lighting a candle and some incense, I come back to
my core. I can observe each thought in that moment, and realize that I am NOT those thoughts. I am the observer of the thoughts—the WITNESS. I am more than the momentary anxiety, joy, sadness, restlessness, empowered thought—I just AM.

Thoughts and emotions are fleeting, so take a five-minute break to notice your thoughts,
to let them flow through and out, and concentrate on your breath. Just come back to your breath when you notice the thought. Your breath is your life force, and it is truly the only constant.
From moment to moment, you can always count on that. Breathe in and out, and go out into
the world filled up and ready to give back.